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  • Bella Duncan

Reach Out

For any reason, at any time, you can reach out for help.


Experiencing divorce, separation or family conflict is never easy.


No matter what position you are in or what your unique circumstances are, there will always be challenges that you are faced with.


When standing in front of these challenges, you may feel overwhelmed, frustrated and even lonely.


But here’s the thing, you are never alone.


Seeking help is one of the strongest things that you can do.


Let’s break down the importance of reaching out, seeking help and understanding that it is OK not to be OK.


Reach Out – Why?

Whether you choose to acknowledge it or not, there are various obstacles you will face when experiencing divorce, separation or family conflict.


If you’re a kid whose parents have decided to separate, you will encounter challenges associated with acceptance, worry and forgiveness, just to name a few.


If you’re a parent who has recently separated from your partner, you will face challenges associated with parenting, anger and sometimes maybe even guilt.


If you’re a friend, teacher or colleague you will face challenges associated with understanding how to support somebody you know experiencing divorce, separation or family conflict.


The moral of the story is that everybody experiences challenges and obstacles.


Sometimes these situations can feel overbearing, monstrous and even impossible.


You are not alone. You are not the first person to encounter these challenges. You are not weak because you are struggling to understand how you will overcome a challenge. You are not wrong because you feel alone, helpless or deflated.


Reaching out takes strength. It requires you to acknowledge that you need assistance, something that can be difficult for many of us.


However, reaching out for help is vital to overcoming challenges and maximising your potential.


Reach Out – How?

Let’s be realistic. It is much easier to tell somebody to reach out for help than it is to actually do so.


Like with anything, it is all about putting one foot in front of the other.


So, let’s break down what steps you can take to reach out for help.


Step One – Acknowledging

Acknowledging that you need help is the very first step that you need to take in order to meaningfully overcome your challenges.


Honestly, this can be the hardest step. We live in a society where we often think ‘it’s all good’ until it’s not.


Accepting your current situation and the challenges that you face is tough, but also possible.


More on acceptance can be found here.


Knowing that you need help to overcome a challenge in your life can be overwhelming in itself.


However, acknowledging that you need help is a big step towards overcoming your challenges meaningfully, practically and effectively.


Step Two – Communicating


To gain help, you need to communicate that you require it.


There is no one way to do this.


There are countless ways to communicate. You can verbally tell somebody you need help. You can write somebody a message or a letter. Whichever way you choose to communicate that you need help is up to you. There is no right or wrong here.


It is also up to you who you communicate that you need help to. Whether it is a close family member, friend or a stranger who is a professional at providing the help that you need, it is completely up to you (more on this in a bit).


The ins and outs of communication can be found here.


Step Three – Taking Action

So, you’ve done the hard yards. You have acknowledged that you need help, communicated that you need help. Now it’s time to get that help.


If you’re gaining help from a professional, a friend or a family member, share what you feel comfortable sharing, take their advice and action it.


For example, sometimes to truly gain the help that we require we must be open and willing to share our fears, concerns and circumstances. This in itself can be challenging, I get it, but you’ve got this.


The person helping you will listen to you, do their best to understand you and provide you with whatever assistance they can to meaningfully help you.


You are not alone.


Reach Out – Who?

Your unique position in this world will determine who you should reach out to.


Examples of people that you can reach out to include:


· Your school counsellor

· A professional psychologist

· Your friends

· Your family

- More on the benefits of siblings can be found here.


There are also brilliant online and phone services that you can reach out to. These include:


· Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800

· Lifeline on 13 11 14

· Beyond Blue on 1300 22 46 36

· Headspace on 1800 650 890


Whilst I am not a professional, I am also always here to listen to you. Please contact me at bella.m.duncan@gmail.com so we can have a chat about anything and everything that I can help you with.


You Are Not Alone

For any reason, at any time, you can reach out for help.

Whilst it may not feel like it at times, you are truly not alone.


There will always be somebody out there, in this world, that cares about you and is willing to help you overcome obstacles and challenges that you are faced with.


Whether the help you require is in relation to divorce, separation or family conflict, it does not matter.


Seeking help is one of the strongest things you can do.


You’ve got this.








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