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Growing Up

As a kid of divorce, the idea of growing up can feel a bit daunting.


I know what you’re thinking: more responsibility, infinite possibilities.


Do you want to look forward to growing up rather than fearing it?


Lets break it down.


What Does Growing Up Mean?

·      Growing older


·      Forming your own relationships


·      Building your own life


·      Gaining more responsibility



This is what ‘growing up’ can look like.


As a kid, these ideas and possibilities can freak you out at times.  


You might be thinking: what do you mean I have to grow up? Build my own relationships? What if they fail? What if I get a divorce like mum and dad?


Thinking about all the things that could go wrong can be exhausting.


Shifting Perspective


Here is what you can do:


Shift your perspective.


Replace your fear with a new perspective. A perspective that focuses on:


·      The possibility of opportunity


·      The possibility of being in control of your own life


·      The excitement of forming your own relationships


·      The opportunity to focus on what is in your control and what is not


·      The possibility of existing outside of your parents’ divorce, ‘the schedule’, conflict and resentment.


How Do I Shift My Perspective?

Shifting your perspective is not always the easiest task, but it is possible.


Shifting your perspective means moving away from fear and toward living your life and enjoying growing up.


There are three pillars to shifting your perspective:


1.     Visualisation

2.     Belief

3.     Consistency


1.     Visualisation

You need to visualise what you want ‘growing up’ to look like.


Visualise how you see yourself. What you want to be doing. How you want to view the world and those around you.


Be careful to not mix this up with visualising how you want others to be. Remember, you can only control yourself and no one else.


This perspective shift is all about you.


2.     Belief

You have to believe that what you’re visualising is possible.


You have to believe that you are capable of growing up exactly how you visualise it.


3.     Consistency

You must be consistent in visualising and believing in what you want your growing up look like.


This means being consistent with the idea of looking forward to growing up, rather than fearing it.


You’ve Got This

Growing up can be daunting.


But, it shouldn’t be daunting on the basis of your fears associated with your parents’ divorce.


Remember: visualise, believe and be consistent.


Your future depends on it, and you are the only person in control.


You’ve got this.


If you have any questions about this topic or any questions regarding the kids’ perspective in general, please contact me at or by submitting a form here.

Growing Up as a Kid of Divorce


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